Summary

Aladdin is a street urchin who lives in the faraway city of Agrabah with his faithful monkey friend Abu. When Princess Jasmine gets tired of being forced to remain in the palace that overlooks the city, she sneaks out to the marketplace, where she accidentally meets Aladdin. Under the orders of the the Sultan's evil advisor Jafar, Aladdin is thrown in jail and becomes caught up in Jafar's plot to rule the land with the aid of a mysterious lamp. Legend has it that only a person who is a "diamond in the rough" can retrieve the lamp from the Cave of Wonders. Aladdin might fit that description, but that's not enough to marry the princess, who must (by law) marry a prince.

Quotes

Genie
Aaaaaaaaaah! Oy! Ten thousand years will give you such a crick in the neck! Hang on a second. Whooooooa-whoa, does it feel good to be outta there! Nice to be back, ladies and gentlemen. Hi, where're you from? What's your name?
Aladdin
Uh, uh-uh, Aladdin.
Genie
Aladdin! Hello, Aladdin, nice to have you on the show. Can we call you "Al"? Or maybe just "Din"? Or how about "Laddie"? Sounds like, "Here boy! *whistle* C'mon laddie!"
Aladdin
I must have hit my head harder than I thought.
Genie
Do you smoke? Mind if I do? Oh, sorry Cheetah--hope I didn't singe the fur. Yo, Rugman! Haven't seen you in a few millennia! Give me some tassel! Haaah, yo-yo! Say, you're a lot smaller than my last master. Either that or I'm getting bigger. Look at me from the side--do I look different to you?
Aladdin
Wait, wait a minute! I'm--your master?
Genie
That's right! He can be taught! What would you wish of me, the ever impressive, the long contained, often imitated, but never duplicated (duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated, duplicated!) Ge-nie Of The LAAAAAMP!

Genie
So what'll it be, master?
Aladdin
You're gonna grant me any three wishes I want, right?
Genie [as William F. Buckley]
Ah, almost. There're a few provisos, a--a couple of quid pro quos.
Aladdin
Like?
Genie
Ah, rule number one: I can't kill anybody. So don't ask. Rule number two: I can't make anybody fall in love with anybody else. You little punim, dere. Rule number three: [as Peter Lorre] I can't bring people back from the dead. It's not a pretty picture--I don't like doing it! [as himself] Other than that, you got it.
Aladdin
Uh, provisos? You mean limitations? On wishes? Some all-powerful genie--can't even bring people back from the dead. I don't know, Abu--he probably can't even get us out of this cave. Looks like we're gonna have to find a way out of here.
Genie [as Robert DeNiro]
Excuse me? Are you lookin' at me? Did you rub my lamp? Did you wake me up? Did you bring me here? And all of a sudden, you're walkin' out on me? I don't think so. Not right now! You're gettin' your wishes, so SIDDOWN!
[as himself] In case of emergency, the exits are here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, anywhere! Keep your hands and arms inside the carpet--weeeeeeee're... outta here!